blow up dome Gifts, Giving, Graciousness, Guilt

\ "When you give up your property, you pay very little.When what you really give is yourself.As a professional organizer, I have witnessed some houses that are actually besieged by unwanted items that are either officially presented as gifts or informal by friends or relativesAs I explained to my client, our body "things" are a direct reflection of our "emotional/spiritual" things.Stuff = energy.I work with Janet, 38, and her career, relationships, and self-awareness are not what she wants at all, and she doesn't know why.
Her home is full of unsolicited useless items that her mother gave her.When I asked Janet why she brought these things into her space and put them there against her own wishes, her answer was because she didn't want to "get in touch" with her mother ".Creating the right boundaries and being able to express your needs is part of the growth/maturity process.
After talking in detail about her passive response to the existence of the mother's invasion in life, Janet's physical behavior of taking on the mother's "things" reflects an epiphany about their entire relationship, it really got her into life.When she is hiding behind her mother's good little girl, how can she become a successful business woman and a mature partner of a man?Once the light of consciousness turns on, it's hard to turn it off, and Janet knows it's time to stand up and be honest and direct to her mother from an adult rather than a child's point of view.Janet's biggest fear is that her mother will feel guilty if she doesn't accept what she gives her.
Once Janet understands that she has the right to decide what she wants to bring into her house, she knows that she doesn't have to feel guilty no matter how her mother tries to manipulate her.Together we practice how she will respond to her mother the next time she gets something she doesn't want.Janet will thank her mother very gracefully for her thoughts.
She will then continue to explain how she has sorted out and simplified her life, and while she appreciates the idea, she will refuse to provide items.Or, if these are things that her mom is interested in keeping herself with, she can rent a storage space for her mom.Could the mother explode and try to make Janet feel guilty?Absolutely!In fact, I bet she will do it before she understands Janet won't buy it again.
This is a great lesson in life, because almost every interaction we have with others is such a pattern;People fully demonstrate in every communication who they were at that moment.They will run their patterns by you, just as you run your patterns by them-consciously or unconsciously.Whether it is persistence or not, it depends on yourself, and the clarity within you.
This is the process I really like to deal with "things;This is such a great bridge that allows you to work in a deeper way.There's nothing wrong with throwing away any gifts you don't like, don't need or don't use.Once the gift is given, you can do whatever you want.
If you meet a pattern of receiving unwanted or inappropriate things from people in your life, it's time to come forward and have any necessary conversations.Just reflect a little and you will know what it is.It may be a terrible thing to do it at first, but you are more proactive in life, and it will feel better, and the more you can embrace all your power.
In giving, ask yourself that you give from love, which means no.attached.The only way to make sure someone will like the gift you send is if you ask them directly what they want and then give them exactly.If you find yourself buying too much for someone else, see if you can tell your real motivation.
Do you want to buy feelings from these people?The gift of taking someone out for dinner or outing is good, because then you can spend time with that person as part of the gift;Time together in this way can strengthen the important relationship, which is really important in any case!My final suggestion is that you give it based on what suits your budget.Start at home.Once your own house is sorted out, it may be a great thing to buy gifts for others, now, hopefully, you will sort out all the gifts, it will be easy to pack!